Thursday, April 9, 2009

So Long, Farewell, Auf Wiedersehen ...

Off to Iowa for Easter weekend with the family far and near. But I couldn't resist one little rant (or two) ...

The evening of my last post (lamenting the return of sun-seeking, half-witted trail users) I was cruising my way home along the Cedar lake Trail at dusk. The light was dwindling but I had little trouble quickly verifying what my eye was sending back to me in the form of an awkward image. Up ahead, gliding in a lurching left-right pattern, arms flailing in a hacking motion of probes stabbing into the pavement, slight forward bend in the torso, eyes fixed down at the ground in front of him was a roller skier. Some like to call them "skeeters." It conjures an image. In the fall I can tolerate this type -- xc ski junkie who is praying for snow to some Saab-driving god of winter. But in the butt crack of early spring, after the slop and snow have barely melted away ... . You folks had a banner ski season this year. Hang up your pseudo-ski implements of supreme trail invasion. Try some cross training. Go ride your bike, for the love of Pete!

Lastly, a shout out to the lovely young lady in her Honda, running the light at Calhoun Commons to make a right turn onto Excelsior this morning. All while text messaging with both hands -- the base of your palms barely controlling the wheel. I'm glad you looked up at me as you went by. Yeah, I busted you. Just drive. Seriously, if you or someone you love TMs while they drive -- slap them and throw their personal communication device into a latrine. Enough said.

Be safe, folks. Watch out for rabid rabbits. Don't eat too many eggs and remember, beer stains rarely wash out of Easter dresses.

Cadbury egg yolks,

1 comment:

Rachel said...

Hey Woody,
It has been a while since I have visited your blog. I must say, you are one fantastic writer. I love ALL of your metaphors. They make me happy.
Cheers to you and your family.
ps...I am with you on the texting dumbasses in their cars!